dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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