I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
