So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
