whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
