when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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