just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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