I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
