Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Randomize
