I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize
