Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
