I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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