if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
