He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
