it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize