I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
