gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
