why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
