she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize