i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
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