I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
