is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
