No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
