I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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