In the future we'll all be gay
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
