I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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