just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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