Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
