I need help removing her.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
She told me I should be a condom model.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
