I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
