When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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