Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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