We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
