Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
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