Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize