Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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