she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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