Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
