i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
