she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
