Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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