Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
