I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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