So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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