what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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