I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
