Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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