Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Randomize
