jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Randomize
