The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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