i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
