Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Even my vagina gasped.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Randomize
